Change is the only certainty in embodied life.
We learn about the constancy of our spirit in juxtaposition with the changing nature of our embodied life. Last blog I was talking about attachment anchors. It seems that we must release our grip on attachment to the degree necessary to embrace the flow and the change. Upend our ego to create space for change.
I was at a talk recently where a lovely man spoke about the necessity to crack his ego to make the changes necessary to heal his body from autoimmunity. In retrospect he expressed amused amazement at his initial lack of willingness to change to meet the needs of his body. He often sees this now in his treatment of others. Many people come into his office with a complete lack of willingness to change diet and lifestyle to trade off ego to support wellness. They don’t identify the unwillingness to change as ego at all. They see it as easier to manage illness drug side effects and even death than to let go of ego.
I can identify with this, but I am working on my attachments to release them enough to embrace the further changes required. I hope to crack open gently, so the pieces reassemble with grace. I love the idea of healing my ego and my heart with light and love. The net effect of breaking being a more vibrant being. On this journey I often have questions about the boundaries between ego and understanding, ego and spiritual guidance.
For instance what is the best diet for me to heal my body. I was a vegan when I started treatment for Lyme disease. All of the healthcare professionals on my team suggested strongly that I move to a paelo based diet.
They rarely agree about anything, but I resisted that advice. I worked hard to become a vegan. Did I want to stay vegan out of misplaced ego?
I did change my eating after arguing for about 2 years. It was a process to eliminate nuts and grains and reintroduce animal protein. Now after eating autoimmune paleo for about the same time I am questioning this again. My ayurvedic community worry about the animal protein I eat.
There is so much certainty in both points of view.
How do I separate ego and profit that laces the identity of a vegan versus a paleo eater? At this point I know I want to eat to support my wellness, how I feel each day and my evolving health. What I mean is I want to eat to feel good and get well.
Just how do you listen with determine who is speaking in the chat room of your mind ego or guide? Wade in to the notion of meat or less or no meat, how does it feel right now? Meditate on what rings my chimes and what lands heavy like a thud? Now I feel like bone broth works for me and less meat works for me. More vegetables work for me.
I know I need to lighten up. I need more living food vegetables. Too much heavy food strains my ability to process. For me to release food from ego, means eating what is best for my health, no dependence on taste or quantity. This is a process to embody truth in my choices.