Lyme disease is the master of subtly a world-class masquerade artist. In 2012, Lyme disease took over my life, after a missed bullseye in 2008. From the bullseye until my diagnosis, I continued to make excuses for feeling poorly and listen to the reasons my doctors gave me. I missed the subtle signs of Lyme disease.
Doctors told me I was getting older, and I was too heavy as the main reasons for my pain and injuries. Sometimes people get put in the box based on how they look and act. I fell into a victim mentality. I didn’t listen to the part of me that knew something more than excess weight and age was behind my symptoms.
As a result I missed many subtle signs; something was wrong. Many were easy to brush off, but others screamed in my face. My doctors and I dismissed them all. I can identify with the frog in the beaker who kept adapting to higher temperatures until it died. I kept adjusting to more pain and inflammation and almost died.
Emotional Health Shift
The most subtle signs of lyme disease were psychological and mental for me. I shifted from a happy person with a long fuse to a person who could become enraged in an instant. Managing my job and my life went from normal to a draining challenge to impossible.
My ability to problem solve decreased. I had a super memory and analytical skills, which I used daily in my job. Over time my recall and clear thinking were less dependable. When I checked in with my health care team, I heard that this is normal during perimenopause. I thought I was losing my mind. I would be traveling on business and forget why and where I was going in the car.
My anxiety and frustration increased, my coping skills were stretched to the limit. At one point, my boss called me the angriest person he knew. He had his issues, and reasons for pushing my buttons, but still that is a startling thing to hear. When my husband didn’t vehemently disagree, I knew I was in deep trouble. I had no idea how to fix things.
Gradual Physical Decline
Here I was a yoga teacher, and yoga was hurting me rather than helping me. I would lose my balance in simple transitions and fall. When my teacher would ask, I would shake it off, but if you are the only person falling in a class of 100 people, something is wrong.
It took me a few falls to figure out that my fitness was deteriorating even though I was working out regularly. Balance was off in a way that quick movements transitioning from pose to pose was undependable. My kinesthetic awareness declined to the point that I needed to stop teaching practice yoga only on the floor.
I felt like a victim with attackers all around. My own body attacked itself. There was no trust between me and it. The lines of communication were blurred and inaccurate.
Restricting my practice was a huge blow, and should have sent me for testing, but I kept thinking, if I lose weight, if I work out more, if if-if. I never thought I have a chronic illness, and I need to get help. I started meditating to support emotional stability and brain health. My meditation teacher had to force me to go for tick-borne illness testing. I so appreciate her help.
Health Awareness Highlight Subtle Signs Of Lyme
Pay attention to trends and trust yourself. Examine your life from thirty thousand feet now and then. Learn from and appreciate the different view. Breathe to create space before overreacting. Ask forgiveness if you speak or act in a way that does not reflect your best self.
If you feel like something is wrong, or pain is on the rise. Don’t dismiss the reality of your experience. Reach out to your health care team. If you don’t get the help, you need to expand your team and bring in new members.
The body speaks in the language of sensation. Pain is your body telling you to make a change. If you dismiss it, the universe will raise the volume, trying to get you to listen. Lyme disease was the universe screaming at me to listen to the needs of my body and get help.
The purpose of this website and its contents is to share and educate on Lyme disease recovery strategies. The information provided on this website is not a substitute for professional medical care, treatment, or advice. All the material here is for information purposes only. Always share strategy and work with your health care team.